Many Christian brothers desire to marry but are having trouble. Usually, the problem isn’t just finding a woman it’s finding the right woman. That’s why they turn to prayer for a Godly wife. In the world, we live in today finding a good Godly woman to be your wife can be quite the task but let us not forget that you have the ultimate taskmaster to pray to for your future wife.
Pray directly for a Godly wife
It’s perfectly okay to pray and ask directly for God to send us a Godly wife. The Bible tells us over and over again to ask and we shall receive. Matthew 7:7-8 reads “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”. But wait…This is one of the most misused and abused verses of the Bible. Jesus is not saying that the Lord is your personal genie here.
God ≠ Genie
If people bothered to read the very next verse Jesus goes on to say that God will not give things that are harmful. You see he’s already setting conditions on gifts. Then verses 13 and 14 go on to say “13“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.”
If Jesus was trying to say that the Lord would be your personal genie then why would he say the path to him is narrow? If you could just wish anything, including salvation and righteousness, then why would the path be narrow and difficult?
The Word makes it abundantly clear in James 2:14-22 that we must work to achieve our goals and desires (even Godly ones).
What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. 16 If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
Will prayer for a future wife work?
To put it simply; no. No one’s going to just knock on your door one day and ask for marriage. If they do call the police. Some Christians brothers will try to use 1 Corinthians 7:27 which says, “Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife.”, as an excuse to be lazy and/or give up. However, if we look at the verse right before that Paul also said: “Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for you to remain as you are.”. It’s critical that as Christians we don’t cherry pick verses and we must take the Word in context. At that time the early Christians were being persecuted and even killed. That’s why Paul advised against finding a spouse at that time.
So if you keep asking yourself “why is God keeping me single?” pray and ask God “why am I keeping myself single?”.
Here are some prayers for Christian guys seeking a wife
Pray not to be thirsty
Some guys who are looking, instead of giving up, will try too hard to get a woman. They’ll settle for someone that they know isn’t right for them or worse for a person that is just using them. I tell you the truth desperation is never attractive. There was a sister in my church who had been diagnosed with type II diabetes. She was desperate to lose weight so she wouldn’t need to go on insulin. She kept jumping from on diet to the next. In January she tried Weight Watchers. She lost a little weight but didn’t think it was fast enough so she went to Jenny Craig in February. She still wasn’t satisfied and she went to Weight Watchers and so on and son. By October she had done 8 different diet systems, spent hundreds of dollars, and was only 8 pounds lighter than when she started. She allowed her thirst for quick results to rule over her decision making process.
Another brother was advised he was overweight and was in danger is becoming a diabetic. After his appointment, he and his wife discussed what would be the best way to lose weight. They both decided to do a low carb diet together. They used Green Chef to have their low carb ketogenic meals delivered to them so all they had to do was cook them. After 6 months he lost 60lbs and his wife lost 20. Praise Jesus!
Pray to listen, not only hear, to what others are telling you
I had a friend that was single and didn’t want to be. He was befuddled as to why since he was an electrical engineer in decent shape with a good salary. All the girls he talked to were either gold diggers or they wouldn’t call him back after 1 or 2 dates. I told my friend to consider not talking about himself, his salary, and his accomplishments so much. I told him that he should really try to get to know the girl he was meeting. He would just shrug me off and keep complaining. You see his problem was he was hearing me but he wasn’t listening. I was trying to tell him that he comes off as cocky and entitled to most women except to those looking for a sugar daddy.
Now he’s 35 & unmarried, and still not having much luck…until recently. Four months ago he called me and finally admitted that he was too cocky and his standards were way too high. He said he was going to make a real effort to curtail his arrogance. Just yesterday he called and said he’s been on 4 dates with a nice woman he met from eHarmony. They’re taking it slow but it looks really good is what he told me.
The truth is not just me but other people have tried to tell him what the true reason (him) that he wasn’t having much luck but he chose not to listen. The bottom line is if someone you trust is giving you hints about your problems so long as it’s congruent with Biblical teachings then it should be considered.
Pray to lose weight if you need to
A buddy of mine was having trouble finding a good Christian girlfriend to walk with him on his path towards the Lord. He had a decent job but whenever he wasn’t at work he’d sit in front of his computer playing WoW all day and eating Cheetos. Needless to say, he was rather…err…portly.
He would confidently say that looks shouldn’t matter to the right girl. Fast forward 5 years and he’s still single. He called me one day almost crying “Jake I’m sick of jacking off into this d*mn rag and watching porn!” he exclaimed. Then he asked why no good girls were interested in him. After years of sugar coating it I was exhausted and just plainly told him “Because you’re fat and a lot of girls don’t like fat guys.”. He just sat there in silence for what felt like an eternity. Finally, he said “yeah, you’re right.” and hung up.
He began exercising and cut these vegetables out of his diet. He worked really hard to get in shape. Eventually, he did it and while he’s still single he’s been on a lot more dates than before.
I would be remiss in my duty if I didn’t point out that we too must work to make ourselves physically appealing to a female as well. Remember, women have eyes too. I’m not saying you need to have abs to get a good girl but if one is overweight working to lose some of it will help you tremendously in your search for a suitable spouse. Not to mention as servants of God Christians are commanded to take care of our bodies (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) (1 Corinthians 3:16-17).
Pray to work to make yourself as physically appealing as possible.
Pray to see if looking abroad is right for you
Consider looking abroad for a suitable spouse. More and more people are going abroad for a spouse these days. Many men are because they’re looking for someone younger but still shares their values. Some women like educated men abroad. True story: a good buddy of mine was having a really difficult time with the ladies here. They kept pressuring him to do things he felt weren’t in God’s plan and some even asked for money. In the end, he ended up broken-hearted. We (some friends and I) and his parents suggested looking to the Philippines for a wife with good values. Seeing that he’s Filipino it wasn’t a stretch for him so he did. He met a nice woman on Christian Filipina. They talked for 6 months and he finally went there to meet her last July. While they’re not married yet they’re both very happy. He says everything is “so far so good”.
Pray to look in the right places
If you are looking for a good Christian spouse then you must go where there are good Christians. The first option is the church.
Side note: Just because you meet them at church doesn’t mean they have Jesus in their heart!
The second is online. Dating online as a Christian can be a daunting task that some Christians may be hesitant to undertake. There are sites that will help you with that, though. By going to a site like Christian Mingle the other users are, by default, saying they are Christians and are looking for a Christian partner.
Now, does that mean every single person on there is going to be a righteous saint? No. But it makes it a lot easier than having to sift through hundreds if not thousands of profiles to get someone you want. When I signed up the site asks you how often you go to church and how important is your faith to you. This weeds out the lukewarm or those that aren’t that serious about their faith.
The number one dating site for Christians is eharmony. Their matching system is second to none and they do a great job of weeding out the insincere and those who just aren’t right for you. I met my wife on eHarmony. Read my story.
Related: eHarmony vs Christian Mingle
Pray to be a righteous person
Over and over I hear Christians ask why they can’t get a good righteous man or woman. The truth is the answer is in the mirror. Do you curse? Gossip? Tell white lies? You may not think people notice those things but they indeed do. If you want to meet a righteous person then you must first be righteous yourself. Notice, I said righteous not perfect. We all sin and will continue to sin for the rest of our lives but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be working to grow and improve. If you make a sincere effort to grow, I tell you the truth, those around you will notice–including a potential mate.
Christian Dating Deals: