It’s Saturday afternoon. You have no date and you’re alone in your studio apartment watching all the couples outside enjoying themselves. Alright, you think you know how to get a date on tinder so you decide to kill some time on tinder. You swipe and swipe until you see her…
At first you think ‘oh spam bot’ but you check and discover…holy shit she’s real!
You decide to hit her up but you don’t want to seem thirsty so you play it cool…
“Hey baby show me some love”
You have been blocked…
You feel a punch on your gut and you ask yourself
“Will I ever get out of this fucking rut?’
“How do I get a date on trindr?!”
This is exactly what a young man that came into my office had experienced. He was recently made single and wanted to get back in the dating scene but he just couldn’t get his mojo back.
I worked with him and after about 8 sessions, eventually, he ended up finding a good girl. He says things are going well and has no complaints. He even sent this photo to show his progress.
How did I help him?
First and foremost let’s get one thing out of the way. If you’re here just looking for cheesy one-liners this isn’t the right article website. I’ve never seen a one-liner work outside of scripted television and I doubt one will work for you.
If you’re here it’s because you’re looking to make a girl crave you and not just piss her off to be annoying.
If you are tired of tinder want a new site for women that are willing then try Ashely Madison. They’ve made a comeback in the last year and they are looking to serve guys that are just looking for open minded dating.
Let’s start off with the basics on how to get a date on Tinder
Increase your appeal on Tinder by:
1. Improving your pictures – you can find some guidance online. But in general, professionally taken pics, you not looking in the camera and not smiling have been proven to be successful (although some girls prefer guys who look at the camera;)
2. Improving your description – do write something, it shows you are making a little effort to seduce. In doing so, please avoid clichés (most men like sports, traveling and good food) write about what makes you special and unique or funny. No inspiration? Ask your friends and family what they think makes you unique.
3. Make an effort- “hey” isn’t going to cut it! If you want a girl that’s normally out of your league you better put some effort into it and show her you’re willing to work for her hand! You should message her like she’s the absolute girl of your dreams!
A good opener on tinder should be a message that demonstrates you actually read her profile. Let’s say you read Denise’s profile she says in her profile that she’s a student, loves rabbits, and her favorite color is pink.
A good opener would be something like this:
Just wanted to say what’s up. What do you study? When I was a kid I had a rabbit his name was Oscar; getting him was the best Christmas gift I’ve ever gotten! Too bad he wasn’t pink though! Haha!
It isn’t necessary to write an entire paragraph in order to make a good tinder opener. You just need to show her that you put some effort and that you’re looking for more than to just get in her pants (even if that’s all you’re looking for).
In that opening, you’ve created at least at 4 different avenues of productive conversation.
- Talking about school- you can ask her what her major is. You can talk about what you’re studying and what does she plan to do with her life when she finishes school. These are just a few examples.
- Talking about rabbits. You can talk about your rabbit and ask her why she loves rabbits so much
- Talking about your childhoods
- Talking about your favorite colors
A really good thing is you’ve shown her you have a sense of humor and made her chuckle. Once you’ve made a girl laugh you’re already halfway through the door!
What you say to a girl is very important!
Assuming you’ve already done that let’s go into the nitty-gritty of how to get a date on tinder.
Be Physically Appealing Yourself
We guys will always go for a good looking girl every time. While it is true women don’t base attraction on looks nearly as much as we do sorry Sam but looks do matter!
In the case of my client, we’ll call him Jonas, in the case of Jonas he had gained a few since his girlfriend broke up with him and it showed. He had a nice gut hanging over his belt which wasn’t attractive for a 22-year-old.
I gave it to him straight.
“Son if you want a girl like that you’re gonna have to lose some weight”
He said he knew and asked what’s the fastest healthy way to lose weight and I told him the key to weight loss was sitting right on his kitchen table!
Create Good Karma
Okay, so let’s say you’re not overweight but you’re still not getting the results you desire on tinder. The next step is to create good karma for yourself. I am a firm believer in you reap what you sow!
How did you treat this girl when she hit you up on tinder?
Don’t get me wrong its perfectly fine to not be interested in someone but the way you express disinterest determines what kind of energy you put into the world.
If you replied to her with ‘yeah right bitch’ just remember that the next time a girl blocks you on tinder. If you just didn’t reply or politely told her you weren’t interested then you’re doing just fine.
What if You’re Not Rich and You’re Not Hot?
Maybe now you’re thinking okay I already knew that stuff but I’m still not getting dates on Tinder! I’m not rich and I will never be hot what do I do?
Don’t worry about that!
We’re not all 6-foot jocks and yet many of us still can get a date on Tinder or any other app. The trick is to make her think you’re hot!
I’m not kidding!
There are about 5 secret triggers in the female brain that you can use to make her think you’re hot even if you’re not. Once you’ve learned them you won’t need to worry about ‘oh I’m too short, oh I’m too pale, or oh I’m too thin ever again!
One of the things you must do is learn how to fake it until you make it!
Girls love confidence but hate cockiness. Where is the line is something many guys often struggle with.
Here are some tips to skate that line between confidence and cockiness perfectly!
Girls see how you treat others.
I was sitting in the bus one day and I saw this really cute couple. He was good looking and so was she but what made him attractive wasn’t what you might think. He was actually kinda skinny and just average height.
What made him appealing was how he treated those around him. An old lady stepped onto the bus and he immediately got up and offered his seat to her.
She said ‘oh no no that’s okay’ but he insisted she take his seat and he stood for the rest of the bus ride.
At first, I thought ‘oh what a nice guy’ just like everyone else. That is until I saw the smile on his girlfriend’s face. At that moment she was proud to be his girlfriend and I knew he was gonna get her best sex that night.
That’s why he did that!
Girls love a guy that treats others with respect because it gives her confidence that you won’t turn on her and be an asshole down the line.
Stand up for her!
I was out with one of a girlfriend one night at a football game and the guy in front of us was being totally obnoxious. He was yelling, showing his fat belly, and frenching his girlfriend in front of everyone.
He didn’t care that he was annoying everyone else around him he only cared about himself. I was about to say something when my girl said ‘hey men tone it down you’re ruining it for everyone’.
To which all 6’3 of him stood up and told her to fuck off. All 5’8 of me immediately stood up and said ‘what the fuck did you say?’. He repeated it. I told him if he didn’t apologize the consequences would be severe.
Long story short a fight ensued and I lost…badly…
All I remember is being dazed and two security guards breaking us up. I felt terrible having just gotten my ass kicked in front of my girlfriend.
I hadn’t spoken in the car when she said:
“Wow John that was amazing”.
“What?” I replied confused.
She said ‘yeah you took on that guy for me and I’ve never had a guy do that for me before”.
“But I lost”
“I don’t give shit. You took on a 6’3 black guy…Just the fact that you did it makes me so happy and she whispered ‘and turned on’. “
The next night after I recovered lets just say she made me forget about all my bumps and bruises!
Are you serious? Then try this…
Are you serious about a relationship? Maybe you’re ready to settle down? Consider a more legitimate dating site. I’ve found that sites that require payment weed out a lot of the wierdos & trolls. There are many different sites to chose from. The ones I would comfortable recommending to you are eharmony, match.com, and christianmingle.com.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves
You still need to get a date in the first place. To sum things up if you want to know how to get a date on Tinder here’s what you must do:
- Tired of tinder? Try Ashley Madison or Adult Friend Finder
- Be as physically appealing as you can (see if keto is right for you)
- Have good pictures (wiki how to take good selfies)
- Put effort into your profile description
- Make an effort when you message her to talk about her interests right away
- Make good karma (learn all about meditation and spiritual energy)