Are you looking for the signs that a godly man is pursuing you? Despite what we may have been told guys can be shy as well and there are many situations where just coming out and declaring his love just isn’t possible. Whether it be because he’s at work or just doesn’t want to make the situation awkward. That’s why many Godly guys will give signs that he likes you.
While there may be subtle differences from person-to-person they all revolve around the same thing: a tendency to be in your company as much as possible.
You will recognize them by their fruits…
Signs a Godly man is interested in you:
The first sign is that he’s nicer to you than to other girls
A Godly man should treat all women with kindness and respect but a Godly man that is interested in you will give you a little extra. Maybe you’ll notice he’s always opening the door for you or offering to carry your bag whenever he sees you. You can also notice him asking if your car is okay or something like that and offering to fix it even it’s a minor thing. This is to demonstrate his handy skills and show you his masculinity.
The second sign is making an effort to be near you
Is he always sitting next to you or near you in church, work, class, or wherever? Does he walk with you when he sees you? You’ll start noticing a guy that likes you making excuses to see you and be near you. He should also be willing to go out of his way for you. If a guy gives you a ride home when you live on the west side of town but he lives on the east side that’s a very good sign he likes you.
The third sign is he’s asking about your relationship status
Some men, like me, would just straight up ask ‘are you single?’ but some guys are more subtle than that. He may try to get you to volunteer your relationship status. If a guy is interested in you then you should notice questions like “so what do you do on weekends?” or “I’ve been single for 3 years how about you?”. If it seems like he’s trying to get you to spill your guts about relationship status that’s a great sign he likes you!
The fourth sign is in his eyes
Edgar Allen Poe said the eyes are the windows to the soul and it couldn’t be truer to tell if a guy likes you or not. Next time you see him look more closely at his facial expressions during your interactions. You want to look for pupil dilation as that’s an uncontrollable sign of desire. You also want to see if he raises his eyebrows or licks his lips when he’s talking to you. Also is his smile wide? What I mean is when he smiles at you do all of his front teeth show? When men like someone we tend to smile wider than normal without even noticing it.
The fifth sign is that he really listens to you
I admit it; we guys aren’t necessarily the best listeners but we try our best. What you’ll notice from a guy that really likes you is him making an effort to really listen to you. We know women liked to be listened to and when we like her we’ll definitely listen–especially for signs that the feeling is mutual.
When I was single I used to play therapist to get a girl to like me. Trust me ladies if a guy is playing therapist, unless he has a degree in psychology or something, it’s not because he enjoys listening to you gossip or complaining about your problems with the other woman down the hall, it’s because he likes you and is trying to gain your trust.
The sixth sign he likes you is he’s testing your faith
When I was single and looking the most important thing I was looking for in a wife was her conviction to Jesus. Unfortunately, Christian men can be the favorite target of gold diggers because they know we are obligated by our faith to take care of our wives and fulfill their needs. That’s why I needed to make sure she was serious about God and not just in Christian groups and websites just to find a good guy to take advantage of.
If a nice lady caught my eye I’d observe her carefully. I’d ask myself “Does she go to church every Sunday?” “If she came to church was she late every Sunday?”. “Was she dressed appropriately for a church function or dressed to appeal to a man?”. I can’t believe how many women come to church dressed like they’re in a nightclub and then can’t figure out why they only get guys looking for one thing! In other words, I wanted to know not only if she talked the talk but did she walk the walk in her faith.
Next, I wanted to know what her beliefs were to see if they were congruent with mine. Obviously, we were both Christians but how literally did she take the Bible? Was growing in her faith a priority for her? Did she actually enjoy being a Christian or was she just in church out of tradition or because she was single?
The seventh sign is that he compliments you…a lot
Men know that women like compliments and when we like a girl we like to compliment her. It’s not even something we think about. When we see her the first thing we say is “oh that’s a pretty dress” or “oh your perfume smells nice” without even thinking about it. Some of the younger brothers may say that you’ve lost weight thinking it’s a compliment. Don’t take this personally ladies; he’s just inexperienced but trust me he meant it as a compliment.
The eighth sign is that he tries to protect you
Guys have a natural instinct to defend girls from threats whether they be animals, other guys, or even plants. If you see him watching out for you then that’s a good sign. If someone inadvertently says something you don’t like he may speak up on your behalf. When I was courting my wife I’d swat insects away from her without even knowing what I was doing until after the fact.
The ninth sign he likes you is that he introduces you to his friends & family
A guy looking for a wife will want the approval of his friends and family. That’s why if he likes you he may introduce you to his friends to get their opinion of you before he proceeds. Usually, he’ll introduce you to his best friend or someone else close to him since their opinions are the ones he trusts the most.
The tenth sign a Godly man likes you is people compliment you two
Your friends might say something like ‘oh you two look great together’ or people may even think you’re already a couple. If this happens just ask him ‘I wonder why people keep saying we look good together? I guess it must be true’. That’ll be a good hint to him that you’re interested in him as well.
The eleventh sign a guy likes you is if he’s jealous
How does he react when he sees you talking to other guys? When a man likes a woman he hates to see her talking to other single guys. He may try to play it cool but trust me he’s steaming on the inside. You can tell if he comes around and politely interrupts every time he sees you talking to another guy. If he asks if you like him after you’ve talked to another guy that means he’s jealous. He may probe further about your feelings for the other guy. This is the way we guys size up our competition.
Beware of false signs!
Sometimes when a girl gets the tickles for a guy she starts making up signs in her mind to convince herself the guy likes her. That’s why, if you notice, I didn’t just say ‘pray and ask God for direction’. While any question should begin with prayer we must look objectively and listen for God’s answer.
In my church, the leader of our praise team is quite handsome and charming. Many of the young ladies had him in their sights during morning worship. Some would even try to convince themselves he liked them back. They would say he looked at them a long time during the praise songs. The truth is those lights are quite bright and he’s not looking at anyone. When he’s staring down it’s because the lights are so bright he’s trying to give his eyes some relief.
Most guys out of high school understand the onus is on them to let a girl know he’s interested. That means if he likes you he’ll make it known sooner or later. You don’t need to sit there and ponder so hard about it. If maybe you are talkative I would advise you to tone it down a bit and focus more on listening than speaking. God gave us two ears but only one mouth for a reason.
Should a Godly woman pursue a man?
Many Christian sisters ask me if it’s okay for a woman to pursue a man. The question is understandable given the images we see of worldly women going after the men that they like. But remember the world’s way is not God’s way. I strongly advise Christian women not to pursue men. Christians tend to be old school and the old school says a man should pursue a woman (Proverbs 18:22 says it too). So many Christian men might perceive being pursued by a woman as a sign of thirst or worse that’s she’s easy!
A young lady I was counseling asked me six years ago if she should pursue a young man that she really liked. I told her she could send signals that she was interested but she should let him pursue her if he’s interested. She kept calling back with excuses like “but maybe he’s just shy!” or “it’s the modern era now!”. Finally, I told her “Denise [not her real name], I’ve already advised you on what you should do. Women should not pursue men no matter what the world tells you is okay. God set things up the way he did because he knew what was best for us. However, It sounds like you’ve already made up your mind with what you want to do and I can’t stop you”.
She went on and pursued him and they began a relationship and she was so happy at first. She even made veiled gloats towards me when she saw me at church and made sure to tell me they were talking about marriage. When they got engaged and seemed so happy I even took a step back and asked God if I was telling young women the right thing by advising them not to pursue men.
Then about 6 months later she became ill like she never had been before. It went away and she just figured she had a bad flu. However, lesions began to appear on her skin. She went to the doctor and they drew some blood. One week later the doctor called her into his office, sat her down, and informed her she was HIV positive. The news got worse. The doctor said she had scarring in her uterus and it may never be able to support an egg. In other words, she was possibly infertile.
Turns out her lover was a secret homosexual and would sneak around with men one or two weekends a month. He only went out with her as a cover from his family and was never going to marry her. He got the virus and transmitted it to her. I say this only to let you know that every time we violate God’s law because we think we know better there are always unforeseen consequences.
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